On my list of true words, I’d have to rank “beauty is painful” among the top 20. So yesterday, my friend (let’s call her Anne) had me over. And while I was there, she was telling me how she had a standing monthly appointment with this lady that comes to her house to give her a thorough grooming session. And she told me about this particular treatment she got that got me so intrigued. I knew then that I had to witness this myself.
So her grooming lady – Zainab, knocked on the door promptly at 2pm looking so innocent – you would never guess she had with her, a bag of pain. After a few moments of pleasant small talk, we made our way to Anne’s bedroom, locked the doors and got down to business. Anne began by laying a blanket on the floor and stripping down to her underwear. While Zainab went into her bag and brought out this jar filled with what I can only describe as some brown looking goo.
Time to get to work. I got the hot water and Anne assumed what appeared to be her all too familiar position. Zainab then proceeded to scoop some of the goo and plaster it over a section of Anne’s left leg and began to pull on it.
The screams…oh the screams. Zainab was so relentless, though, plastering the goo over one section and pulling at the goo. No cares. No apologies. “Poor Anne”, I thought. Was trying to distract her, when she goes, “you get used to the pain, it’s like break ups”. Had me almost rolling cause it’s the most random thing I ever heard. But you see, Anne is a very attractive girl that gets a lot of attention, and takes a lot of pride in looking as awesome as she can all the time. Don’t blame her. But oh, how I felt for her (for myself and all the women who go through all these painful treatments to look as perfect as we can). Being plucked like a chicken. After one leg, Zainab moved to the next and then, she proceeded to inflict the same punishment on Anne’s underarm and then to her nether region. If I thought the leg screams were bad, boy did I have another thing coming. At least, the wax was finally over.
Now for the interesting part – So after the wax, Anne jumped in the shower while Zainab began to prepare the long awaited treatment. She took out the stool that I had thought was some kind of room decor from its little, hidden corner and detached the clay pot from it.
She filled the pot with some coal and threw in a struck match or two, allowing it to catch some momentum. By the time Anne got out of the shower, the pot was all hot and ready to go and it was at that moment that Zainab added the pièces de résistance – the “Dohel” (honestly not sure of how to spell it). The best way to describe it would be “medicinal and aromatic herbs for the vagina”.
She placed the pot in the middle of the room added a handful of the “dohel” to the burning coal and placed the stool on top of it, aligning the hole in the middle, with the pot underneath. Anne took her rightful place on the stool and Zainab swaddled her in a blanket and her part in this dance was done. She packed up her possession and took home her bounty. Meanwhile, Anne stayed seated on that stool for the next 30 minutes with me serving as her hand in that time.
What the hell is this treatment? And why has Anne decided to punish herself like this? Apparently, the treatment is called a vagina steam and helps clean the vagina and keeps it fresh and smelling [and otherwise tasting] nice 😉 😉. It’s just yet another treatment we as women go through to keep us looking and feeling like the goddesses we are.
Do I dare try this out? I mean I’ve read all the literature on pH balance and the vagina, but do I experiment with this? Would you?